How To Be A Kick Ass Relationship Coach

Relationships are certainly the most important part of our lives. They bring so much meaning and contentment to us and to those around us. We gain happiness from the positive relationships we have build in our lives and looking back, those are all that would matter.

Everyone of us in in relationships ! They take many forms. In order for us to gain the skills to develop such relationships, everyone needs the right coach with the right skills. Before you even read further – there is one quality you need to have if you want to be a relationship coach – empathy.

Today’s blog I will discuss the following!

  1. What is a coach?
  2. Traditional coaching vs intuitive coaching
  3. Our process
  4. The problem with the relationship coaching industry at the moment
  5. The coaching equation
  6. Do I need a certification?

What is a coach?

A coach does things very differently. The first thing you need to know is that you’re not a counsellor, a consultant, or a therapist. You’re not here to give advice. You’re not here to pity your clients and get emotional with them and give them solutions and tell them, “ Oh yes, leave him because he’s abusive.” You are here to give your clients a supportive environment. Remember coaching deals with healthy minded individuals.You’re here to give your clients a nurturing environment to make rational decisions.

You’re here to help them evaluate and critically think about their choices. You provide them a conducive non biased environment to make decisions by setting targetsgrowing and developing. Your job is to keep them accountable. When you have sessions with your client, let’s say biweekly and the client comes back, they promise to do some tasks from last week – did they really do it? A lot of clients will promise to do things but do not do it. As their coach, you have to make them stay accountable to themselves.

You usually help your clients set goals realistically and ways to achieve them effectively . A lot of clients might set unrealistic goals. If the relationship is really gone bad and you know that there’s no way that it could be improved and your client still wants him back, it’s your job to help her be realistic about the situation. It won’t be easy, but you have to let your client see the options and think for herself how she should be more realistic.

 As a coach you help clients get past their roadblocks because as a coach, especially as an intuitive relationship coach, you’ve got to tell them about blocks they don’t even know exist.

You also going to help them break their limiting beliefs because many of them are stuck in a fixed mindset. They’re stuck in traditions and mindsets which are not serving them. You will help them break their limiting beliefs and create new concepts into their lives. 

Of course, expanding their comfort zones. A lot of them would want to do things that they have brainstormed about but not do it because of the fear of trying something new and your presence will help them expand their comfort zone and gain confidence. Many of my clients don’t like trying new things, just because it “seems” alien. As their coach you need to first show them the available options and encourage them to get out of their comfort zones.

Being present is important. Now, if you’re having a personal problem, if you are not well or if you too many things happening during Christmas, please reschedule your appointments because it’s really, really unfair to your clients for you to appear for an appointment and not be present. The one thing you must give them is your presence and your unconditional attention. Lastly, the most important thing is for you to be reliable. If you have promised your client to show up, please show up. If you’ve had a bad night and you can’t show up, please let the client know. A coach has to set the right example to her clients for the trust to grow in the relationship.

This is a $2 billion industry and it is going to double in the next 5 years. Everybody wants to be a relationship coach. How are you going to be different and why should YOU become a coach? The money is a turn on. Of course you want to come here and you want to make money, but the most important thing a coach must have is that you must have a vision. You’ve got to ask yourself, why do I want to become a relationship coach? Do I want to change my life? Do I want to change the life of my clients? Do I want to just be rich? Do I want to really find a rewarding life purpose? 

So find your compelling vision? Why have you come here to become a relationship coach? Now, if your vision is strong enough and if your vision has one or two or three of the things that I mentioned above then you are at the right place. Any one coming here just wanting to be a coach but does not have a compelling vision behind it -let me just tell you this is really not for you, but if you’re going to come here with a vision of wanting to change your life and the life of somebody else and using this purpose to reward your clients and yourself and give them brand lease in life and then you are at the right place.

Traditional Coaching Vs Intuitive Coaching

So to conclude, you help them to set targets, be accountable to themselves, find their roadblocks, find their own solutions, and get empowered. How can you do this ? You are going to learn various tools which I’m going to teach you, and your duty as a coach is to use this tools to help them. I have created amazing checklists, complete forms and quizzes where you can actually really tap into the client’s situation and find their REAL problem.

Most traditional relationship coaching programs give you a one standard program to every single client and thus it is ineffective for varying relationship problems. Advice provided is generic and doesn’t apply to every individual client blueprint. It is rigid and external and the solutions tend to solve the symptoms, not the problem. Thus you work with client problems on a generic level and help them steer their way along. So what happens at with a traditional relationship coach – you meet your clients, hear their problems and discuss strategies to deal with it. A lot of the solutions given are based on what you have perceived about your relationship and the coach will guide you based on the situation.

As an intuitive coach, we approach things differently. We don’t just give our clients generic advice – a one size fits all for all relationships! Simply because we are all different and thus our problems are different and so must the solutions! Clients come to us with the symptoms they are feeling in the relationship. They are lonely, sad, abused or unloved. They might be subject to name calling by their partner or they fee their partner is acting suspicious.

 So how they feel or what they are experiencing are the symptoms- not really the problem because if I’m feeling unconnected to my partner, if I’m feeling resentment or unloved by my partner, that is not really a problem. That is a symptom from a problem which exists in my relationship.

Thats the key thing to remember. Using our intuition (which we all have but lies untapped) we use our intuitive tools to link our client’s symptom to her problems and we can actually tell her what the real problem is.

Can you see how empowering being an intuitive relationship coach is? You tell your client her problem! 

So for example, if she with a man and she’s constantly feeling unloved, and feels he doesn’t have time for her, he’s not sincere about his feelings and suspects he’s keeping me a secret. What she has told you are JUST the symptom. If you delve deeper into the issue, you will actually find out that your client is actually the girlfriend of a married man. So the problem of this whole situation is basically infidelity. 

Can you see how the problem is not the same as the symptom. When we have a fever is the body’s defence mechanism to react to something that’s not right. So in the same way feeling unloved resentment and unwanted is because you are the other women in this relationship. The problem is infidelity with the symptoms of feeling unwanted and unloved. 

We don’t only give them the problems we also take them through our special relationship re engineering process.

Our process

So how does the process work? When I meet a new client, and she tells me about her “problem” – I intuitively check into her and her partner’s blueprint to check a few things using my intuitive tools. Each and everyone of us has a higher consciousness, but we do not tap into it but this is where we get answers and know what clearly happens. We all have an intuition -we just need to learn to access and hone it. Our intuition to give us he following answers.

  1. What her elemental type is
  2. What his elemental type is
  3. The shared karma
  4. The life theme
  5. The congestions & incongruences in the relationship

The information you get about my client is powerful information – it tells you their compatibility score, the baggage you have accumulated in this partnership and the reason why you are experiencing certain experiences in your relationship. This information will enhance realisation and consciousness in their relationship. The REAL problems – the congestions and incongruences will tell your client what has transpired at some earlier stage in her or her partner’s life to have caused this drama and you give her a permanentrevolutionary solution.

The problem with the relationship coaching business at the moment 

What most relationship coaches in the industry have got it all wrong. They are either simply obsessed with the latest traffic source or marketing tool and completely ignore the real deal – which is to solve client problems. Most worry about he latest facebook ads feature, the next best targeting option or click funnels. In reality, they don’t have the right tools to help their clients. 

Also truthfully, as a relationship coach starting your own path, you need some business skills which most relationship coaches don’t have and aren’t taught.

When I first became a coach, it was really difficult for me to master the business side of things because I was not a trained business woman. And over the years with my experience, I’ve realised that learning to become an effective coach not only requires you to know the workings of being a good coach, but at the same time you need to know how to be effective in getting clients. I hugely focus now on getting the business side of things right because if you don’t have clients, you don’t have a business! A lot of times people need a business coach when they become a relationship coach to help them how to handle the business side of things because it is equally important.

Results. I speak from experience here; it is one of the most empowering feelings in the world when you see your clients find themselves in their relationships and make empowering decisions.My goal as a coach is really to see my client get results, and most traditional coaches don’t really have a way to measure that. My client usually come see me because they are in bad relationships. They usually want their boyfriends to come back, their husbands to be faithful, or they really want to find love because they don’t want to be alone. I can’t promise to bring their boyfriend back. I can’t make sure that their husband stays loyal. I can’t make sure that they attract love in their life. What I mean by results is I help my clients get empowered in their relationship. I make them feel confident and enough to either move forward without regret or fix the relationship. And that is what I call results. This is what I call empowerment.The pinnacle of this feeling for me was when one of my clients recently managed to get out a dead marriage of 20 years after some re engineering work.

The Coaching Equation

Like I mentioned earlier, its a huge industry. Let me introduce you to the coaching equation. This is how we go about creating value in the marketplace as a coach. If you’re new and you don’t have a target market, if you have never started a coaching business before and you’re like, “What am I going to do? How am I going to make any money? I don’t know anything. I don’t know any problems to solve. I don’t even have a Target Market.” I’m going to show you how it works. I’m going to show you how it’s really quite simple.

What is the coaching equation? It looks like this, just like we had our law of nature which was the thesis, antithesis and synthesis. We have target market, offer and result. We choose a target market and then we look at the target market and we’re like, “What is the problems of this target market?” You must choose a target market which is a group of people. We want to make sure that they’re similar and we must identify a painful problem that they want to solve. What’s a problem that they have, then we must identify a powerful desire for a solution or transformation they have. What is their current situation and what is their desired situation?

Then we have an offer. An offer is the promised solution, service, information or advice that you provide. It should be designed to solve the problem and achieve the desire of the target market. When you create an offer, you don’t just make some stuff up, you don’t just throw some stuff in a bag like most relationship coaching practices. You look at your target market and you look at where their current situation is, then you look at where their desired situation is. You didn’t make those up, you actually went to the target market and asked them. Now you’ve designed an offer that is designed to help someone get from their current situation to their desired situation. It should be designed to solve the problem and achieve the desired result of the target market. It should be minimal in terms of your time and offer value.

Then the two collide. The target market and the offer. Here, the way to think about it is literally just like a chemical reaction. Imagine if we had the target market, the current situation and the desired situation, then we put it into contact in a test tube with an offer that we’ve designed. Now the two are in contact with each other, they’re reacting. There’s going to be some change. The person is told to do this thing, the person is told to do that thing, then the person tries doing that thing and they try doing that thing. Now things are changing, change is taking place, things are shaking up and there’s a reaction. After the reaction comes the result.

That really is how simple it is. It’s a target market, an offer and a result. The target market collides with the offer, then comes about a result.

It can also be reduced into an equation like this 

Target Market x Offer = Result. 

How do we understand if we get something right or wrong here. The end result should be what was desired at the start and nothing else. The result should be as close as possible in the least amount of time possible. We’re looking for results that are profound.

If you have identified the right target market and give them the right offer, there is no way there won’t be a result! When our clients gets results, we get results – its the mirror effect!

Do I need relationship coaching certification?

No, you don’t have to be certified to be a relationship coach!But being trained in intuitive coaching techniques, counselling skills and modern research on cognitive behaviour can definitely go a long way in getting clients on board. This can help you become an exceptional relationship coach who can help people achieve their goals When you are trained to be a relationship coach, you will gain credibility and learn better teaching methods, thereby making you more efficient.

The self learning processes are created with the idea of evaluating your coaching skills and creating parameters or benchmarks to help you improve. It also shows your clients that you are committed to becoming a relationship coach and have valuable knowledge that will make an impact in the world!

Wouldn’t it be amazing to help people improve mentally, physically and personally? And imagine doing this while living the life of your dreams in a career that gives you all the happiness in the world!

No matter what profession you are in right now, whether you’re an executive, a current coach, close to retirement, or even a stay at home parent, by becoming a certified professional relationship coach, you can help the people overcome challenges and achieve lasting results in their relationship. 

Kaysha Ubrani


Is My Relationship Over ?

Is My Relationship Over?

Deciding to stay or leave a relationship is a major decision. A decision which many women feel helpless about. One of the worst feelings in the world is feeling stuck and disempowered in relationships and choosing to stay just because…

Making a big life change is pretty scary – but know what’s even scarier. REGRET – Zig Ziglar

Here’s what we cover in this blog:-

  1. Are you tired?
  2. Why does living with him become difficult?
  3. Solution-less problems
  4. Problems of conflict
  5. Underlying problems
  6. To stay or to leave
  7. Making the decision

Are you tired?

Don’t you feel tired? After trying hard to juggle things and people in your life – your work commitments, your spouse, your children and friendships and yet no one is happy most especially you – you feel tired.

You try so hard to make your life is perfect but that gnawing voice that keeps saying “It isn’t perfect”, “I am making compromises.”, keeps echoing in your head.That feeling drives you to try again and again to make things better in your relationship/

You seem to have tried meditation, affirmations, love rituals, reiki, chakra healing, the law of attraction, the Secret and nothing works for you! You feel inauthentic and like a failure. You just don’t know how to solve this. What should you do?

Its one of two things usually for most of my clients- either they aren’t financially able to leave or they just feel trapped emotionally in the relationship and feel disempowered to take such a huge decision.

This decision to leave a toxic relationship really throws you off balance.You find yourself at a fork in the road. You have followed the “right” path, educated yourself, found a good job and gained the respect of your peers. And yet, despite all you had accomplished, your disempowerment in your relationship leaves you feeling frustrated and confused.

You begin to ask yourself these questions

  1. Is this just something everyone feels at one point or another in their relationships?
  2. Are my expectations from my partner too high?
  3. Am I being spoiled to think that my relationship should provide me with the type of fulfilment and gratification we see in romantic  movies?

A women holds on to her relationship mainly because she is afraid that she will not find another person and be single all her life.

So instead she settles. The problem with settling in a relationship is that you know it’s not best for you“

Why does living with him become difficult

There are basically three main kinds of issues that I feel would really be the cause for a woman to decide to finally leave the relationship. Many want to do it but few have the guts or courage to actually walk out. No matter how independent or strong you are, to walk out of a relationship is more than just a physical decision. Let’s look at the kinds of problems relationships face.

  1. Solution- Less problems (the stuff there’s no coming back from)
  2. Problems of Conflict (the stuff that requires you to have a relationship pause or breather)
  3. Underlying Problems (the petty, day to day issues that require you to put in a bit of work).”

Solution-Less Problems

These are issues that keep repeating in the relationship again and again. There are simply no solutions and they are either deeply rooted personality disorders or the life situation around doesn’t permit change that is easy.

Sharing a client experience, Stefan was always verbally abusive towards Nora when he got angry. He even sometimes got physically abusive with her at times. Every time she decided to leave he would say sorry 100 times and explain that he didn’t mean it and she’s too sensitive.

Sorry with no changed behaviour isn’t ever going to change things. Stefan kept saying sorry but never really thought he was wrong and thus there wasn’t a change in his actions. When he got angry again, he repeated his actions. Nora felt disempowered – she did believe he loved her and she so wanted to believe he would change but time and again she would be disappointed.

There was really no solution for Nora – but to leave. Stefan wouldn’t change and she was hurting every other day.

Cheating is another such problem. Usually after a cheating episode, its very hard to keep the relationship going and strong. Kayla cheated on Sam – she had her justifications and after a long year of separation, hate, anger and agony they both decided to get back together – the relationship could never ever be the same because Sam could never ever forget and every time they fought he would bring up the cheating, insult her with his mean words and never ever let her forgive herself. It was hard for her to stay in the relationship because she knew in the back of his mind – he would never ever move on from that incident and she felt belittled and unable to feel normal. It was best to be leave – some  major damage like that can’t ever change the status of the relationship no matter how much you try to make it work.

Even life situations sometimes force you to leave because the scar is just too deep. After Nancy lost her baby at 6 months due to a genetic defect, her relationship with Andy could never ever get better. They went for couple counselling, tried therapy and healing sessions – nothing worked. She bore the grudge that he couldn’t do anything to save her child. She hated him for being able to move on so easily. She felt like she was the only victim and he wasn’t grieving enough. He couldn’t understand how to help her and grieved alone. He didn’t even show her his grief and spent more like outside home drinking, with friends and even had an affair.  All these actions brought such a rift in their relationship – she felt so stifled and depressed and she finally walked out.

We all have a meltdown point and when we reach it, we will decide to leave -the cons just need to outweigh the pros of staying. Same with Nora, when the abuse reached a point where there were more bad days than good days

Problems of Conflict

These are core problems which happen in a relationship. The couple needs to reassess the relationship at this point at see if the conflict can be stopped and find a better way to deal with the issue.

Kathy and Aaron were very different people. They were mismatched from the beginning – they were just different at core level. Kathy was a freedom lover and needed her space in the relationship and Aaron on the other hand was a very judgemental person – he analysed and over analysed all her actions and her need for freedom meant to him that she wanted space away from him and she didn’t love him enough. She on the other hand felt so stifled in the relationship- she couldn’t breath being controlled this way.

They constantly fought over small issues and all this conflict reached a point of communication breakdown. They just couldn’t talk to each other anymore. I suggested they take a break from each other for a while – sometimes a separation time really makes you think –

  1. Is being right really that important in the relationship?
  2. Is compromising that hard ?
  3. Is the love important enough to fight for?
  4. Does my ego really matter so much?
  5. Can I really change myself to accommodate my partner of is it taking me out of my authenticity?

We are all different at core. Living with the differences become hard sometimes when respect flies out of the window. Kathy couldn’t respect Aaron because he had double standards – one for him and one for her. She felt he was being unfair and she couldn’t respect him for that.

Conflict sometimes arises due to interfering family members usually leads to problems and thus separation. It could be the children, an interfering mother in law or just a spinster sister in law. Even friends sometimes can become causes of conflict in relationships. We all live in a community and thus all these conflicts have to be addressed – else they will become the reasons for a toxic relationship.

I have seen many relationships split because of mother in laws who could never stop interfering and finally made the couple have so many arguments and thus their own problems. In cases like that – it sometimes just seems like the best option to take a break because the situation wont ever change. Maybe a break from the relationship make your partner realise he needs to step up and change things.

Conflicts also arise because of different values and beliefs. Ron broke with Gina because she refused to have sex with him till they got married – and he was like – Which generation do you come from? What if we are sexually incompatible? I can’t ever do that! But Gina stood to her “values’ and in the process caused Ron to finally lose the intimacy and move on. Both were not wrong but both believed in what they were brought up with – sometimes these differences can be the cause for you to leave.Gina felt he didn’t really love her and didn’t respect her belief system and she decided to leave him.

Conflicts happen in all relationships but when do you really make it the reason to leave?When they become so unbearable that you have to decide to walk away and stop yourself from the  draining and detrimental relationship.

Underlying Problems

These are just niggling issues that exist that have no solution to – like for example if your partner has a drinking problem. He’s awesome and you both vibe well – but when he drinks, he becomes someone else. Well he tries not to – but when he does you see a side of him you totally detest. This issue doesn’t affect you usually but its underlying and can erupt anytime. Shelly lived with such a man. She got really afraid when there was peer pressure to drink- often times when her partner used to drink, he started misbehaving with other women, often even sexually harassing them – once he even hit Shelly when she tried to tell him off. She was afraid of social situations and at one point, she just decided to leave.  She felt she was living in fear and anxiety of when this monster will emerge. He was a ticking time bomb.

Karin lived with a bisexual man. She never knew he was bisexual when she married him -obviously he gave her many reasons for not being sexually interested in her and she believed him. Once she got a call from his boyfriend telling her that her partner was his lover. Her world came crashing apart – he did provide for her and was a very kind man. But his other side was a problem she couldn’t grapple with – she needed to get out and finally feel free as this underlying lie was eating her up.

To Stay Or Leave

To stay or leave is a decision we have to make.It’s always harder to do the latter – its something new, something uncomfortable, something out of the comfort zone, something risky. What if I am worse off? We all want guarantees in life but life comes with no such thing. And thus, 8 out of 10 women choose to stay – and suffer. Like they say a known devil is better than an unknown one.

Leaving a toxic relationship is liberating. It gives you doors to other better opportunities which you would miss out on if you stayed in that relationship. Mary was in a bad relationship with Andrew for 12 years. She knew Nick liked her – she kept hanging on to Andrew hoping he would change, worried she would be making a wrong decision to leave. When she did finally leave Andrew – Nick had already moved on and married to someone else and she regretted losing such a wonderful man and in the process wasted 12 years in suffering and till today goes for therapy.

Beatrice caught her husband of 20 years cheating – she decided to get divorced immediately. She stayed single for 2 years – she dated men but nothing worked and she felt dejected and lonely at times. Then she met this awesomely sexy man who cooks, gives her orgasms and is the sweetest man she has ever known. She is so happy she got divorced – else she would never have met him!

Making The Decision

If you feel stifled, unhappy and simply feel stuck in your relationship – it’s time to make the decision.

Being in toxic relationships are harmful. If you are constantly abused, either mentally physically, or emotionally, if you feel trapped and stuck, if there are constant arguments and  snide remarks and you constantly are feeling unfulfilled you need to take serious action. This is a serious relationship problem.

Ask yourself

  1. Am I at your best self in this relationship?
  2. When I’m away from my partner, do I feel better or worse?
  3. Do I feel bad about myself in his company?
  4. Do he really make me feel horrible about the way I look, the way I am and my personality?
  5. Am I being mentally, emotionally and physically traumatised?

If the answers to all these questions are yes then it looks like it is about time to leave.the relationship. Making that decision is the first step of many new steps to your liberation.

Kaysha Ubrani


Get To Know Me

I am a woman with many facets. 

Originally from Singapore, I now live in Kuala Lumpur with my husband and two children. Although she comes from a North Indian ethnicity, our Speaker always felt she was a global citizen and never really “fitted in” anywhere.

With a formal education in accounting, 15 years of  experience in the fashion scene of Kuala Lumpur,  to now becoming an intuitive relationship coach – she has definitely come a long way in finding herself and her passion. 

A mother of two challenging teenagers and a full time coach – she spends most of her days at home – overseeing the house, the kids and working on her budding business – which has become her passion and her newest baby. Although it consumes her, she admits that she is loving every bit if it. To her it was like like having found her life purpose and soul calling.

With an avid love for the outdoors and travel, I enjoy high intensity in everything she does. Its either 0 or 100 percent for her always. 

Extremely disciplined and self motivated, my most admirable feat to date is to have surmounted Kota Kinabalu alone. 

I describes her life motto in 3 words – Always Day One! 

I believes in this philosophy – in all areas of her life and tackles each day with renewed gusto and zest. She enjoys her gym and meditation time the most and she feels very connected to her higher self. And that makes her happy, she says.


Why Do I Keep Attracting The Same Kind Of Men?

Your Vibe Attracts Your Tribe

So Amy was married to Dave. They had major issues and she got divorced. She then met Steven – it was all rosy for one year and then the same issues she had with Dave happened with Steven too. She felt disappointed with life and had no choice but to leave again. She met Mark thereafter, and guess what – the same thing happened!
She came to me for a relationship clearing session and I saw there was a soul agreement with her and Mark – I told her you both had lessons to learn together and thus the issues. Then she asked me how about Dave and Steven? How could I have soul agreements with so many men??
These are questions I’m sometimes asked by my clients, especially when they are grappling with repeating difficult relationships.

There are very interesting shifts and changes happening within human relationships these days with the internet and access to people all over the world. We have far more choices as to who we spend our time with and who we associate with.

The possibilities available to us about who to be in relationship with are quite overwhelming. We meet the same Souls, over and over again – not because we were somehow karmically “fated” or “destined” to “learn lessons” together but because we kept making the same choices, and thus continued to be a vibrational match with them.

Of course there still are many Souls that we encounter that we’ve had relationships with in past incarnations.We feel a familiarity with these Souls.Do we HAVE TO examine choice and consequences through relationship with these familiar Souls?No … mainly, because so many other people are available to us to be in relationship with!

We have to remember that our choices are OURS.

You are the problem! Not them!

Do we have to do so with the same exact Soul that we were in relationship with five lifetimes ago, when we first created the negative karma?

Nope.We can work “our stuff” out with many others Souls that are now available to us. Because it’s OUR individual “stuff” even though we may have created it while in a particular relationship.

If we encounter difficulties over and over again with ONE person, it’s easy to blame that person for all our struggles. It’s easy to make the struggle about the relationship itself, rather than acknowledging how WE are creating our own pattern of negative choice and consequence.

Amy blamed Dave for her failed marriage. She then blamed Steven. And Mark. What was common in all these relationships? AMY.

Nowadays, we have the opportunity to engage with a lot more people! And now we we have the opportunity to encounter the same difficulties over and over again – with our three husbands, the various family members we have, the different people all over the world that we may encounter in our work dealings.

If we leave behind a marriage and recreate the same exact struggle elsewhere … well, we have to take responsibility. When the same struggle arises for us, over an over again with DIFFERENT people … well, we have to acknowledge that WE are the common denominator.

Your relationship experience is all about you and you nowadays have a bigger challenge and opportunity to learn about your lesson with more souls because of the evolving world.

Interesting or not ?




If you have been trying to manifest something in your life that you are not attracting, if you’re focusing on your future, you might be heading in the wrong direction.

Contact me today.

Sometimes, it can be something from your past that’s holding you back.

It might seem contrary to conjure up the past, especially an uncomfortable memory, to create a happier future. After all, don’t you want to put all that behind you? If it was difficult, why bring it up now? Aren’t you done with that already? (especially after all the self-help you’ve already done!). Yet, healing your past can often be the quickest path to creating a happy future.

I see this all the time. A client will come to me feeling hopeless after going to doctors, therapists, and healers, doing affirmations and creating visions boards, and their lives are still not changing. Most often, there is a pattern from their childhood, or even their past lives that are preventing them from getting what they want.

For instance, if someone wants to find their soul mate and they saw their parents in an unhappy marriage, they might have a subconscious fear that being married means you are miserable. Or, someone who wants to become pregnant now who died in childbirth in their past life could have a subconscious fear about going into labor. The beauty of discovering and healing your past patterns is that it can completely liberate you to create a joyous fulfilling future.

If we look at the Akashic Records as an energetic storehouse of all-there-is, a library if you wish, it would make a lot of sense that we can also shift and transform that energy, if this is in alignment with the highest good of everyone concerned. And this is exactly what I do in my sessions. Energy work in the Akashic Records raised my work to a totally different level — I was now able to help my clients raise their vibration, and clear some major blocks that were keeping them small. At the same time I was raising my own vibration and consciousness, through exposure to this energy. It was like sitting in the sun. Whether you feel it or not, you get a raise in your consciousness.

But how does soul-level healing work? What is happening exactly when I do the clearing? What shifts can one expect after a clearing session in the Akashic Records? 

The way this universe works, we have a choice to create our own world each and every minute. Free will and the power of choice is a crucial spiritual concept, although sometimes we can experience it as limiting, or unfair. The problem is that while we make choices at the soul level, most of us were born with a major “soul amnesia”, and had no clue why we were placed into all of these terrible families, people who didn’t understand us, in violent brutal countries, having to struggle with health issues, and so on. In order to reclaim our power back, we must remember who are…

And the first step in the Akashic Record reading is exactly this, seeing and understanding the choices we had made, and the reasons why we made these choices. Even by itself, it is a very powerful paradigm shift (that may take a while to integrate — I think it took me personally a couple of years). Understanding that you, and in the majority of cases you alone, made a choice to incarnate exactly where you were born powerfully takes down the victim mentality, all the poor-me-I-must-have-killed-someone-in-my-past-life script.

That is powerful. That is big.

From my perspective, the next step is to look at some of the major issues that your soul has been struggling with lifetime over lifetime. I have a specific protocol that I follow when I look for blocks and obstructions that your soul is ready to clear at the time of the session. I am not interested in long detailed past life stories. What is important is when and how your blockages originated, and what blockages these are. Let me give you an example.

Sometimes, a soul may have chosen to experience the life of a nun, or a wandering preacher. On a personality level, we would have made a promise, before God and men, with a very strong conviction and a very distinct energetic signature, to remain celibate for the rest of our lives (and, perhaps, thinking, “for all eternity”). This promise, very often a ritualized vow, leaves a mark on the soul. Even when the personality is gone, and we have transitioned, the soul still carries the energetic signature of the vow.

As a person, on a human level, you will have no conscious memory of these vows. But your soul remembers very well! Some of the energy carries over to this lifetime (sometimes, a multitude of lifetimes), and the disconnectbetween the soul and the personality manifests as self-sabotage in the area of relationships. Now, all your relationships will somehow not work.Something somewhere will go wrong and you just can’t get intimate in your relationship or make it last.

Now that we have this awareness and knowledge of this vow that you had made, we are able to bring the power of intention into your Akashic Record, into the energy field of your soul, and ask for this vow to be cleared. And it really is as simple as that — ask and you shall receive. When your soul is ready to let go (and it’s usually the time when you start feeling dissatisfied with your current situation and start looking for spiritual solutions), these vows that no longer serve you are cleared in an instant.

What the soul-level clearing does, however, is helping you gain more clarity about your path, and give you the ability to make new and better choices. As your 3D circumstances gradually align with your soul desires and mission, you will see for yourself what a uniquely powerful and transformative journey that your soul signed up for!

Are you ready to take the leap of faith with me heal the blocks in your life, change your life forever and start living as your soul truly desired. Are you ready to manifest the life you truly want?

I hope you are. And your soul is..


Akashic Records

Are You A Contingency Plan?

People treat you the way you allow them to

I’d like to share a relationship story of one of my client.
A client that I’ll refer to as Melody has been married for 19 years to her husband Mark. She has been stuck in indecision about whether to stay or go for years, as the marriage felt increasingly disconnected and she was feeling increasingly abandoned and alone.
About a year ago Melody re-connected with an old flame from college, who I’ll refer to as Jonathan. Since then, the relationship between them accelerated quickly, she fell in love and has never felt more adored…or more confused.
She didn’t go out looking for an affair. She never intended to end up in this place.She’s not trying to hurt anyone.

Melody and Jonathan began making plans about how they could each leave their respective marriages in the next 12-18 months and be together. (They, like many people, have this odd belief that the children will somehow not be impacted emotionally once they turn 18 and have graduated high school…as though our kids lose their ability to feel emotion upon graduation.)

Melody was feeling optimistic and hopeful in her life for the first time in almost a decade.

Until she got the call from her lover, Jonathan. His wife found out about the affair, both their lives blew up in an instant, and he has now re-committed to his marriage and his family and is going to try to make his marriage work.

Melody understood, but went from hopeful and optimistic to heartbroken and in despair inside of a ten minute phone conversation. Now she’s mourning the loss of that love affair inside of her marriage and wondering what she was going to do?

She tried to find peace with a decision to remain in her own marriage…

And because she wasn’t committed to making it work with her husband Mark, she tried to convince herself that she could simply exist inside the marriage, unhappy, abandoned, and alone forever.

She was nursing a broken heart, while each day pretending to love her husband.

Her husband was essentially being treated as the “contingency plan.”

Now that her lover was no longer an option, she was back in her marriage as a default / consolation prize / contingency plan. Of course, her husband doesn’t realize this. He can only see that she’s sad and unhappy and he doesn’t know how to fix it. So he waits, hoping it’s a season for her and not a lifetimeThat. Must. Suck.Seriously.

Melody’s husband, Mark, who she has been married to for almost two decades is now a contingency plan because her lover is no longer an option.

I hope I am never someone’s contingency plan, when what they really wanted and desired for themselves is no longer an option.

Mark doesn’t deserve that. I don’t deserve that. And neither do you…or your spouse.

If you’re with me, it will only be because you’re choosing me each and every single day.

If you’re only with me because you feel shackled to me…..that’s not love, that’s prison.